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I have often contemplated "why I am the way I am" and what may have led to my fascination with cross-dressing and feminine things. I grew up in the 70's-80's, and one thing, among others, that I remember vividly is the Virginia Slims girl. I remember thumbing through my mom's magazine's, eagerly looking for the new ads every month. As I rode in the car with my parents, my gaze was fixed on the billboards for Virginia Slims. Remember those? For me, I think it definitely had an influence on my desire for cross-dressing.

We all know that society is filled with double standards. Nothing is said or even noticed if a woman wants to be a mechanic, or dress in baggy clothes, etc. She is thought of as a tomboy or "liberated". But, if a man is a ballroom dancer, wears skinny jeans, and paints his nails (even if he paints his nails black), he is usually thought of as gay and immediately outcast. I'm sure this hits home with many of you! For me, that has been one of the biggest frustrations in living my life as a CD. Can't wear heels, can't wear a skirt, can't wear makeup, can't dance with my arms in the air, etc.

Well, those VS ads fueled both my desire and my frustration in a big way. It represented, not only beautiful, sexy, strong women, but it also represented something that was "forbidden". It was like, "I can't smoke a Virginia Slim, because, that is just for women". So, add that to the already long list of can't do's.

And, I always thought there was just something so sexy and feminine about those pretty girls in their high heels smoking a long Virginia Slim. Of course, there have been other brands that came along - Eve, Misty, Capri - all feminine, all "just for women". But, there is still something about Virginia Slims that makes my heart flutter. Is this stupid? Tell me I'm not crazy!

I don't mean to offend you if you're a non-smoker or think that smoking is a disgusting habit. That's not the point here. I'm simply reaching back to one of those moments in my life that I can identify as a "connection" - something that may have led in some way to who I am.

To this day, I don't feel fully "en femme" unless I have my Virginia Slims 120's in my purse. I'm not a smoker in every day life, but it's just one of those weird things about being a CD that is hard to understand. I suppose that I always will wonder the many "why" parts of this strange but oh-so-fun journey!

Anyway, I would love to hear comments from anyone who can recall a similarly strange experience.

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Crossdressing

Crossdressing for5+ years
Crossdress at homeI'm limited by other members of the household
Wears at homeBras, Breast Forms, Corsets, Girdle, High Heels, Jewelry, Lingerie, Makeup, Panties, Shoes, Skirt or Sundress, Stockings, Wig
Dressed up at home IEnjoy the experience admiring my reflection in the mirror
Dresses upA few times a year
When dressed I goJust enjoy the experience
Most feminine feature isHow I dress
PassableSomewhat Passable

Swinging Preferences

Swinging Level:Bisexual Couple
Travel:within 50 miles
Entertain at home:Never

My Affair Preferences

Describe your favorite affair fantasyI wanted to be treated like a lady. Hold my hand, kiss me, open the door for me.
Does your partner know?No
How often does your spouse leave you alone?Not often

My Public Sex preferences

What's your favorite public sex places?No public sex for me!
Describe the riskiest place you have had a sexual encounter?On a hotel balcony.

My Cougar/Cub Preferences

Have you ever been in a Cougar/Cub relationship before?No
Is this your first time using a dating site that's dedicated to Cougar/Cub relationships?Yes
Do your friends and family approve of who you're dating?No

Appearance

EthnicityCaucasian / White
BuildSlim
Height5' 10" (178 cm)
Eye ColorBrown
Hair ColorBlonde
Hair LengthShoulder length
Facial HairNone
Best featureLegs
Body ArtNone
Health ConditionNo special condition
Endowment (length)Average
CircumcisedYes
Bra size38 / 85
Cup sizeD
My attractiveness:Attractive

Situation

Relationship StatusMarried
Has childrenTwo
Wants kidsNo
Housing SituationIt gets a bit crazy sometimes
Wants to RelocateNo
AvailabilityDiscreetly
Has a carYes

Education & Employment

EducationUniversity Bachelors
Employment StatusFull-time

Looking For

Must haveIntelligence, Good Looks, Flirtatiousness, Thoughtfullness

Fetishes

FetishesCrossdressing, High Heels, Lace / Lingerie, Pantyhose / Stockings, Shoes / Boots, Smoking, Tongue Fetish

Sexual Activities

I enjoy sex:Once a week
Sex isAlways on my mind
Most partners at once:Threesome M/M/F
Dirty talkTurns me on

Sexual Interests

CybersexI've never tried it
Oral Sex isI want to try it
Anal sex isNever tried it
Sex toys:None of the above
Size matterSometimes, depends on the person

Sexual Fantasies

Sexual fantasyI'd love to be with another crossdresser.
Fantasy locationHotel/motel
Fantasy sex partner:A very feminine cross dresser